Bible Humor

Bible Humor

Bible Humor and holy humor have a unique characteristic. They are thought-provoking in addition to being funny!

Some of the following Christian one liners are more serious, but all are food for thought! Bible humor is never more than a sentence away!



Bible Humor:
Christian One Liners

This is one line humor with a holy twist!

Don't let your worries get the

best of you; remember, Moses started

out as a basket case.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Some people are kind, polite, and

sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Many folks want to serve God,

but only as advisors.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

It is easier to preach ten sermons

than it is to live one.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

The good Lord didn't create anything

without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close...

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

When you get to your wit's end,

you'll find God lives there.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

People are funny; they want the front

of the bus, the middle of the road, and

the back of the church...

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Opportunity may knock once, but temptation

bangs on your front door forever.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Quit griping about your church;

if it was perfect, you couldn't belong..

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

If the church wants a better preacher,

it only needs to pray for the one it has.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

God Himself does not propose to judge

a man until he is dead. So why should you?

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Some minds are like concrete

thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Peace starts with a smile..

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

A lot of church members who are singing

'Standing on the Promises'

are just sitting on the premises.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

We were called to be witnesses,

not lawyers or judges..

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Be ye fishers of men.. You catch

them - He'll clean them.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Coincidence is when God

chooses to remain anonymous.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Don't put a question mark

where God put a period.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Don't wait for 6 strong men

to take you to church.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Forbidden fruits create many jams.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

God doesn't call the qualified,

He qualifies the called.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

God grades on the cross, not the curve.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

God loves everyone, but probably prefers

'fruit of the spirit' over a 'religious nut!'

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

God promises a safe landing,

not a calm passage.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

He who angers you, controls you!

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

If God is your Co-pilot - swap seats!

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Prayer:

Don't give God instructions -- just report for duty!

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

The task ahead of us is never as

great as the Power behind us.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

The Will of God never takes you to

where the Grace of God will not protect you.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

We don't change the message,

the message changes us

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

You can tell how big a person is

by what it takes to discourage him.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

The best mathematical equation

I have ever seen:

1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* - via e-mail

Check out some of the other pages on this site
for more gut-giggling Bible humor!



Christian Clean Jokes

Clean Bible Humor

Go from Bible Humor to Clean Jokes and Humor Home

Share this page:

What’s this?

Enjoy this page? Please pay it forward. Here's how...

Would you prefer to share this page with others by linking to it?

  1. Click on the HTML link code below.
  2. Copy and paste it, adding a note of your own, into your blog, a Web page, forums, a blog comment, your Facebook account, or anywhere that someone would find this page valuable.












Enter Your Email Address


Enter Your Name

Then